The pain that made it worth it.

I remember telling you that you were dependent. I didn't know how to admit that I was dependent too, and I just was trying to make it hurt less to not see you for a little while. I knew it had to be done, and it hurt.

I remember seeing you hurt for days. I hated what I had done. You couldn't control yourself, but in secret, the me you couldn't see, I was breaking too. I cried every night. I couldn't text you when I was hurting, and I didn't have anyone to turn to when I didn't want to do it anymore. I hurted in quiet so that I could be strong for you.

I remember the day you left. I didn't want to let you go. I knew this was goodbye for a while and I remember crying the whole day at school, and the WHOLE night before. I couldn't think of not even talking to or seeing you. It hurt. You were my everything and I just wanted you to get better.

I remember when I made a bad decision. I had a promise and it was my fault. I hurt you and you didn't even know it. I remember thinking every night what you were doing and being sad because I was doing nothing to add up to what you were doing... I had broke promises, friendships, values, and my REAL feelings. I was tired of doing it on my own.

I remember when you wanted to see me so bad you broke the rules for me. I got that call and I panicked. I remember Sitting there and writing anything  I couldn't to make everyone happy. I felt like I couldn't say what I wanted to say. I didn't want to be mean. I had to. I missed you.

I remember looking at the pictures I got of you for hours every chance I got.

I remember when you got home. I wanted to wait until you texted me first, but I couldn't wait. I had to. "Hey you" "I heard you were back, How are you doing" I thought I was keeping my cool pretty well, even though I was all butterflies everywhere, and so happy I couldn't even speak the whole day. We texted and you were doing way better than I was..

I remember when we talked about everything. I was terrified, but I owed it to you. I missed you and I wanted this to work more than anything I have ever wanted. I said everything that had happened, and I was completely truthful. I can;t believe you were home still.

I remember all the time we hung out, or the dates we went on, and I loved every second of them. I went home every time and just melted. I couldn't believe the best thing that has every happened to me still cared about me.

I remember the time you told me you stilled loved me. I was so happy I started tearing up. I loved talking to you and I could do it all night long if you would let me.

I remember when we got back together, It was hard, and I did everything I could and knew how to make it work. I tried everything I could to be the best one to you. I loved you and I wanted to prove it to you. I remember it all being worth it.

I remember the late nights, the tricky situations, and the long talks. I would not trade it for the world because you are worth every second of pain I have ever been through. I am so happy to be together again and never leave again. I remember all of our good memories and one more to come.

I remember YOU Mr. Perfect. <3<3